Canadian butter has gotten weirdly hard,

 won't soften at room temperature, 

  and nobody is sure why.

   anagrams to 

   Now unremote Fart poet to master:

  'Now shattered - eradicably taunting!' 

   'Abhor sunny, dowdyish dear.'

 Man cut out and cooked neighbor’s heart 

‘to feed his family and release demons’

   anagrams to 

  Unodored bucktooth as menacing Farts.

 Eh! A hymeneal, one-sided Fart melodies.

 Traffic Noise Is a Silent Killer

   anagrams to 

Asinine Follicles Strike.  I Fart.

On the Front Page, a Wall of Grief

 anagrams to 

Whoopee! Fart. Long Fag Fart Line.

 American life is a fundamentally hollow 

cesspool of spectacle and misery 

   anagrams to 

  Fart self.

 'I am an unmelodic, lionly whale Ass fart.’

   Coy, melodic ponce pleases.

 

American life is a fundamentally hollow 

cesspool of spectacle and misery 

   anagrams to 

  Fart self.

 'I am an unmelodic, lionly whale Ass fart.’

   Coy, melodic ponce pleases.

 

Why Australia has taken on Google 

and what this means for the future 

of the internet

   anagrams to 

 Goatlike Ass Fart, 

    unhealthy wart hog Ass Fart

  and now

   Eh! The out-of-tune, eminent hire.

   Ass Fart

 French military jets cut off village's 

power supply by flying low

   anagrams to 

 'Joy Farts! Hell Farts! Vengeful criticism.'

 'Floppily ugly spew by now.'