Satanist F@rTs

A self-styled satanist beheaded his cellmate, but the guards failed to notice, report says 

 anagrams to 

 A Smellier Yeti Pee, Shitty Ass Farts, Death-bed Hell Blood Farts Cicadae Dung, Toe Test Anus.

 https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2021-05-27/satanist-beheading-prison-guards-cellmate-california Using a razor-style blade attached to a handle, Osuna disfigured Romero, cutting out one of his eyes, chopping off one of his fingers and removing part of his ribs and slicing out part of his lung. He ultimately cut off his head. He also posed the body, slicing Romero’s face open on either side of his mouth to resemble an extended smile, according to an autopsy. Guards found Osuna wearing a necklace made of Romero’s body parts.

Footballfish F@rTs

Rare footballfish joins limited collection at the Natural History Museum of LA County 

 anagrams to 

 Joy! (Farts) Cool! (Farts) 'I'm noble, unmeticulous, Idiot Anal hellhole, mutant heroicity.'

Yokel F@rTs

Large American Flag Stolen From LA Veterans Cemetery Over Memorial Day Weekend 

 anagrams to 

 Gentleman's gorilla Farts Come! A cleverer, Farty enema. I’m A Nerd Avowed Mere Yokel

 https://www.nbclosangeles.com/news/local/large-american-flag-stolen-la-veterans-cemetery-memorial-day-weekend/2607172/

Stone F@rTs

 Trump’s Friend Roger Stone 

Warns Ex-President He Will 

Face Indictment - And Soon

   anagrams to 

  Good Farts! Prurient semen.

   Expend new ill-wisher‘s Fart! 

   Oddest. Manic. ...Innocent?

  

   

Drunken F@rTs

 North Korean defectors explore the 

soul of a divided peninsula through art

   anagrams  

The excretal poo poo. Farts!

I Devoured A Dunghill. Shit!

One drunken hero. Farts!

 

The Untold Story of Scientology Founder L. Ron Hubbard’s Secret 

Pact With Nazi Propagandist Leni Riefenstahl

    anagrams to 

   Tortuously Farting indecently. 

   'Cobblers whine, 

     unodored ass hotchpot.' 

   Ironhearted, gainless flippant Farts.

https://www.thedailybeast.com/the-untold-story-of-scientology-founder-l-ron-hubbards-secret-pact-with-nazi-propagandist-leni-riefenstahl

Killer Robot F@RtS

 

The age of killer robots 

may have already begun 

- after a drone ‘hunted down 

a human target’ without being told to

   anagrams to 

 Hot weak Farts...

 Tootled ably evil-eyed garbage.

 A Monotone Fart Hole! Dude Run!

 Lightweight, burned-out anathema.

  

Corpse F@rTs

 

Thousands visit abandoned California gas station to view rare “corpse flower” bloom

  anagrams to 

  Vagabond's hideous Anal Fart indications. 

  Worrisome beans, weevil Farts to protocol.

   

Walrus F@rTs

 

Wally the Walrus: Fears for safety 

 as Tenby tourists get 'too close'

   anagrams to 

 Well! Hot Farts, you weasel. Farts.

 Farts cheat. Note lousy sobriety.

 

F@rt Clarinetist!

 

A Caribbean island bet its future on petrochemicals. 

Then oil rained down on homes.

   anagrams to 

   Ooh! Cue Me Up, Fart Clarinetist!

   Darned Whoosh Eminent.

   Cannibal's blood inebriates.

  

F@rT Illusion

The clockwork universe:

   is free will an illusion?

   anagrams to 

 Win sewer-like Farts or

 illusive Hell union. Cock.

 

  

Cicada F@rTs

 

CNN’s Manu Raju Flips Out 

When Rogue Cicada Jumps 

On Him: ‘What the Hell?!'

   anagrams to

  Oh Jesus! Nuns Fart Cum Upon Jail

  Crude magic! Whee! Wham! 

  Ninth Hat Poll.

Bard F@RtS

 

Bard timing: Argentinian TV reports death 

of playwright Shakespeare after Covid jab

   anagrams to 

   Damn It! Bright, overprinted Genitalia Farts

   Averagely hijacked taboos - Fart whippers.

   

   

Nuclear F@rTs

 

First nuclear detonation created ‘impossible’ quasicrystal

   anagrams to 

   Innuendoes lacerate dictator,

   Quality Fart comprises bliss.

  

     

William Amos F@rTs

 

Canadian politician caught by 

online camera urinating during 

virtual Parliament session, just 

weeks after Zoom nudity incident

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  I am an egomania Pig Anus

  Enduring brattier icon.

  Trickily unhygienic Anal Farts.

  Jovial Slum Tart Urinates.

  

Bug-eyed F@rTs

 

India YouTuber arrested for 

'flying' dog with helium balloons

   anagrams to

   I am doubling the oily Farts.

   In hollow or in bug-eyed rude Farts.

  

Say Cheese F@rTs

 

Cheese Photo Leads To Arrest Of 

‘Big Cheese’ Drug Dealer In Liverpool

   anagrams to 

Undeveloped, cheerier gorillas.

Cheapest egos, bloodiest hot Farts.

  

   

Jesus F@rTs

 

‘Florida’s Worst Cop’ Was Just Fired 

for Misconduct—for the Seventh Time

   anagrams to 

Jesus! Farts! Wild, dirt poor cow Farts,

The defective, snoutish common Farts.

Porn F@rT

 

Can Trump Run for President From Prison?

  anagrams to 

 Spit from underminer scorn up porn Fart.

F@rt libido.

 

Rapper dies during bisexual threeway.

 He jumped off a balcony to hide from his wife.

   anagrams to 

  Sexed-up, 

Weird, brainier hay

 Farts plague.

  Ho-hum! Enjoy cheesed off wimp Fart libido.

Haywire F@rts!

 

How your name affects your personality

   anagrams to 

O My! Farts! 

Haywire Farts! 

Cue One Up, Loony!

     

   

  

   

Selfie F@rts

 

Missing man found dead 

inside Spanish dinosaur statue; 

Police say the teen got stuck 

trying to retrieve his mobile phone

after ill-fated selfie attempt.

        anagrams to 

   I am maddening sounds - Farts!

   Geek Up to an insidious ill-fame deathiness.

   Right! (Farts) I'm the Penis oblivion eyeopener!

   Hesitate cutely, tentacled Farts poet.

   

   

400 F@rTs

 

A park ranger in California 

discovered a petrified forest 

filled with fossils

   anagrams to 

  Paranoiac Fart Fetish icons idoliser,

      Fivefold disliked gnarlier Fart spewer.

Oops. F@rT

 

Austrian hospital blames human error 

for ‘tragic mistake’ of incorrectly amputating 

elderly man’s healthy leg

   anagrams to 

  Prime or slime Fart-throb, Almighty Rectum!

  Gooey Farts And Anal Farts Anus.

  Greatly champion hell-like cretin Anus.

Chicken F@rTs

 

Don't Kiss Your Chickens,

The Centers for Disease Control Says In A Salmonella Warning

   anagrams to 

   Cockeyed looniest lameness.

 Scorningly throatier Farts!

    Anal Wind or Ass Chunkiness?

Ostrich F@rTs

 

I went to one of California's last ostrich farms, and it was terrifying

   anagrams to 

   Farts Farts Farts Farts.

   Woe! Looniest inaction.

   Angrily win homicide.

  

F@rT Holocaust

 

Infrastructure talks hit a pothole

   anagrams to 

  Farts threat turnip-like holocaust.

F@rT Gong

 

Alleged drug trafficker arrested in Los 

Angeles after being extradited from France

   anagrams to 

   Genitalia Fucker. Derriere Farts. 

    Gelled Led Gong Farts.

   Excrement of brain-dead Farts.

Crapulous, proper F@rTs

 

White House drops price tag of infrastructure proposal 

in counteroffer to GOP lawmakers but wide divide remains

   anagrams to 

    Good! 

Inspire crapulous proper Farts.

    Meek benefit. 

Dildo up, worrisome weirdo.

    Whee! 

I cut big hot Vagina Farts. 

                                      Cunt Farts.

"The whole situation is tragic":

 

"The whole situation is tragic": 

About a million bees died when 

left on a hot UPS truck for weeks

   anagrams to 

"Initiate slouchiest wart hog Farts.": 

I'm a bonehead! Nudities bellow.

Whoopee! Rotten sulk Fuck.

Wacky F@rTs

 

 Police hunt for man who had rocket launcher

 and threatened Belgium's top virologist

   anagrams to 

   Huh! Nude Bum and Vagina Farts.

   Cheekiest or potent goodwill!

                    Chloramphenicol rotter.

Pasty gorilla F@rts

 

  Mysterious fast radio bursts traced to spiral galaxy arms

   anagrams to 

  Absurdum destroys atrocities. Marx as pasty gorilla Farts.

    ...And yet we have very little idea where anuses come from...

https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2021/05/evolution-butts/618915/

Interplanetary F@rTs

 

Scientists Shot Tardigrades from a Gun to 

See If Interplanetary Travel Is Survivable

        anagrams to 

   Farts Goddamnit! Touchiest Anus goriness.

   Velvety Farts. Irritable Anal perversities.

Gorilla booby F@rTs

 

WNYC Fires 'On The Media' Co-Host Bob Garfield For Alleged Bullying

   anagrams to 

   Mellow deed, unhygienic chilling Farts...

   Farts fondling bug-eyed gorilla Booby.

Cicada Sex F@rts

 

A Fungus Is Pushing Cicada Sex Into Hyperdrive 

And Leaving Them Dismembered

   anagrams to 

   Ugh! Hyped up cervix in Anus Farts Anus idiocies.

   I'm the brave, dead-end lemmings.

https://www.npr.org/2021/05/18/997998920/the-fungus-thats-making-cicadas-sex-crazy

Yep. F@rTs

 

Caitlyn Jenner Gets Dragged Through The Mud 

For Complaining Her Private Plane Hangar-Mate 

is Fleeing California to Avoid Seeing Homeless People 

   anagrams to 

     Farting Anus Jet gently drench right egghead Asshole.

       Over prancing Farts helping apeman Clitoris.

    I are loonie. I am Evil one. Mud Fart ego me peephole.

 

F@rT Waffle

Belgian farmer accidentally moves French border. Farmer moves border stone for tractor – and makes Belgium bigger

  anagrams to 

   I'm a Fart bomb!

   Donkey Farts. Belch Verb. Eel Farts. Germ.

     Crocodile Anal Venom.

     I'm a bugger's Farting demon sorcerer nerd.

      

   

   

 http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/crime/prison-pouch-sentencing-573048

Free Falling F@rTs

 

LOOK OUT BELOW! CHINA’S HEAVY-LIFT ROCKET 

DUE FOR UNCONTROLLED REENTRY WITHIN DAYS

  anagrams to 

    BLOW OUT FARTS CHEEKILY.

          WHITE-HOT, DINKY VOLCANO!

     CRUEL LOONY. NO TENDER, RUDE FARTS.